Legacies

Legacies 1.12, There’s a Mummy on Main Street: Plagued

Dorian and Emma (who we now know are dating) are celebrating their week off for spring break with a picnic by the lake. She gets spooked by a bug, which he teases her about since she just had a mind-controlling slug inside her. They discuss a trip to the mountains he wants to take, then start to kiss, but another bug ruins the mood. Then they realize there are bugs all over their picnic blanket and filling their basket. And that’s the end of lunch!

The latest monster is now at the school, and its feet look like swim flippers. No, wait, that’s Dorian – he went diving to try to retrieve the urn Alaric threw off the bridge. It’s long gone, though, and Alaric feels horrible about getting rid of it. Even though a slug made him do it, he takes responsibility for the possibility that he’s helped unleash another monster. He thinks the bugs at the picnic were a mini-plague, just one of several that have started popping up. Dorian guesses that the river took the urn downstream, and the plagues are harbingers of whatever monster’s going to come after it. He bets $10 that he knows what it is.

Alaric suspects that the urn has gotten trapped in a reservoir. Dorian reluctantly cancels his trip with Emma to go with Alaric to get it. Then he decides to invite her along. Not wanting to be a fifth wheel, Alaric recruits Kaleb to come as well. Kaleb wanted to stay at school instead of going home to his crazy family for spring break, and he’s not interested in trading their drama for Alaric’s. Alaric suspects that he just wanted an excuse to stay in Mystic Falls and feed on humans. So really, Kaleb’s being dragged along on the road trip so Alaric can keep an eye on him (and keep him from exerting his bad influence on M.G.). No vampire powers allowed. Kaleb agrees if it’ll get Alaric off his case. Also, they can’t take a school van.

No problem – Alaric’s perfectly happy driving a mini-van. “Dr. Saltzman, this van is very…white of you,” Kaleb says. Alaric calls it retro. It’s also full, as Josie, Lizzie, and Hope have come along on the road trip. Apparently Hope invited herself, since she wanted to do something useful, and also make up for the plagues that are spreading because she wouldn’t let anyone hurt the unicorn. Lizzie thinks she only came to ruin another Saltzman spring break. Hope denies ever doing that before. Alaric tells the girls to play nice, but both of them ignore him. Josie stays out of it since she’s listening to music to keep herself from getting carsick.

Driving montage! The girls complain. Lizzie plays Punch Buggy so she can have the excuse to hit Hope. Everyone complains about the lunches Alaric packed. Alaric tries to get everyone to sing “99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall.” Josie gets sick and everyone freaks out. Lizzie, unsurprisingly, fulfills the cliché role of the person who asks, “Are we there yet?” Alaric tries to stay awake. Josie gets sick again. Lizzie ask if they’re there yet again. Emma and Dorian look at a map as Alaric insists that he’s not lost. Everyone reluctantly sings “99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall.” Kaleb silently prays for death. Josie plays a ukulele and sings something cheesy. Kaleb gets annoyed when she jostles his seat. Lizzie is starting to lose it.

Finally, the group arrives at their destination, Maple Hollows, South Carolina. While Dorian goes diving for the urn, the others plan to go into town. If there’s another plague, they have a fake story about a gas leak ready to explain everything. Alaric averts his eyes while Dorian says goodbye to Emma. The others split up downtown to find out if anything strange has been going on. Maple Hollows seems pretty similar to Mystic Falls, just without supernatural creatures or occurrences. Lizzie pointedly says that their chances of finding anything are going up in smoke.

Hope realizes she’s getting in a dig bout a fire in Hope’s room three years ago. Lizzie thinks she set it on purpose to ruin the trip the twins were supposed to take with Alaric. Josie tries to play peacemaker, inadvertently distracting Hope and Lizzie from their fight when she gets stung by a bug and the welt starts swelling up immediately.

Kaleb’s with Alaric and Emma, unhappy about being “stuck on the senior citizens’ half of the tour.” He thinks he’s there as a buffer for their awkwardness. Alaric and Emma awkwardly deny that there’s anything awkward between them. Kaleb’s vamp hearing (which doesn’t count as him using his vampire powers, since he can’t turn it off) picks up a noise he thinks is from a generator. The girls hear it, too, as Alaric realizes that the sound is really from a huge swarm of hornets. “This is plague-y, right? It seems plague-y,” Hope comments as everyone else in town runs for cover.

Alaric, Emma, and Kaleb make it to the mini-van before the hornets can reach them. Alaric IDs the hornets as being from another continent. “You’re literally getting geekier by the minute, Dr. S.,” Kaleb tells him. Emma’s bug phobia has her freaking out, but fortunately for her, the hornets all suddenly drop out of the sky, dead. Then Emma gets spooked again when a guy in a Hazmat suit knocks on the window.

As the girls go looking for Alaric, Lizzie brings up the fire again. Hope insists that she didn’t start it, and she never ruined the twins’ spring break. Lizzie begs to differ – in the fifth grade, Hope gave her the flu and the Saltzmans had to cancel their trip to the Florida Keys. Lizzie might never see them now, thanks to climate change. Hope reminds her that Alyssa Chang was sick then, too, so she probably infected Lizzie. As the girls fight yet again, Josie realizes that her sting has turned into a boil. She’s not the only one with boils – the girls come across a bunch of townspeople with them. They’re being boarded onto school buses by a team of people in Hazmat suits.

Everyone gets transported to a FEMA recovery center, where they have to hand over their phones. Hope and Emma wonder how the center was set up so quickly when strange stuff only started happening after the road trippers arrived. Alaric tells the woman taking down people’s names (I’ll call her Alice, after the actress playing her) that they’re from Roanoke and came to see the town’s giant ball of yarn. Emma’s his wife, the girls are his daughters from his first marriage, and Kaleb is both Josie and Lizzie’s boyfriend, since they both claim him at the same time. As they head into the tent to wait things out, Hope passes a familiar face from her last road trip: Clarke.

She tells Alaric that they encountered Clarke in Kansas. Alaric thinks he’s just part of a group tracking the same stuff they are. But the group is well armed and their equipment includes diving stuff. They must be there for the urn. Dorian has just retrieved it, and as he’s leaving the river, a group of those well-armed, well-equipped men ambushes him and tells him they’ll take it. Hornets descend, attack the men, and fly away, leaving Dorian unharmed.

A figure wrapped in bandages appears, with something emitting a green glow from its chest. Dorian squeezes his eyes closed and braces for an attack. But the titular mummy just takes the urn from him and walks away. Dorian sees that one person didn’t get out of the other men’s vehicle, and he saw the whole thing.

Back at the recovery center, Alaric wants to find a way to ease Emma’s fears about Dorian being in danger. Kaleb wonders if he’s more concerned about her or Dorian. Alaric tells him they need to get one of their phones back. The best way would be by breaking his one road-trip rule and letting Kaleb use his vampire powers. Kaleb agrees, but he wants Alaric to come out and ask. Alaric refuses.

Clarke approaches Alaric and tries to trip him up on his cover story of a family road trip. He asks if Alaric has ever been to Kansas. Josie spots him and asks Hope who he is. She explains that she and Alaric encountered Clarke in Kansas, on a trip the twins hadn’t heard about. Lizzie guesses that Hope invited herself on that trip, too, wanting another opportunity to be the hero. She complains that Hope will do anything to get attention. The girls call each other narcissists and Josie tells them to hush.

Hope acknowledges that she might have been jealous of Lizzie and wanted what she had when they were younger, but she didn’t deliberately start the fire. She lost half her stuff, including the only painting she ever made with Klaus. Lizzie actually feels bad but doesn’t apologize.

Clarke asks to speak to Alaric privately, bringing up the fake name he used for Hope in Kansas. Alaric calls an end to the conversation, but Clarke continues it by saying he knows Alaric is from Mystic Falls and has a school for supernatural kids. He tells Hope and Alaric that he works for an organization that keeps monsters out of the public eye. He wasn’t sure if this second encounter with them was a coincidence, so he searched their van and now knows all about them.

His organization is used to having to convince a couple of people at a time that they didn’t see something they saw. He could use some help convincing this whole town that everything’s okay, and he’d like to enlist Kaleb (whom he knows is a vampire because he spotted Kaleb’s daylight ring). Hope asks why they don’t just say the town was infested by a freak swarm. Clarke says someone could have recognized the hornets as harbingers: “This is obviously the work of a mummy.” Alaric, proud of himself for guessing what they were dealing with, proudly tells Hope, “I told you.”

As the mummy heads downtown, Clarke explains that his organization does clean-up, not combat. They’re not equipped to fight the mummy. Really, even with all those weapons? He asks Alaric to get his group (they’re not technically the Super Squad, but I’m calling them that anyway, since it’s easier) to keep the mummy from hurting anyone. Alaric points out that they’re kids, and Clarke reminds him that everyone in town is an innocent without the supernatural abilities the Super Squad possesses. Hope says they’d be happy to help.

Once they’re alone, Hope tells Alaric that the field in Georgia where they woke up after their trip to Kansas was near the portal to Malivore, which is guarded by Triad. She shows him Clarke’s business card, which displays the triangle symbol the dryad drew. Alaric and Emma start planning their strategy to intercept the mummy, regretting that their consciences and feelings of accountability won’t let them leave this to someone else. Emma decides to try to find Dorian. I think it’s partly because she cares about him and partly because if she spends another minute with Alaric, she might do something she shouldn’t. Or maybe I’m reading more into it than is really there.

Alaric fills Kaleb in about Clarke, clarifying that the Malivore pit isn’t Hell itself, but “Hell-adjacent. It’s a tar pit of doom where monsters rot for all eternity.” They need to keep the urn from being dropped into the pit, which will release the second of three locks preventing the destruction of all supernatural beings. So to sum up, they can’t let the mummy or Triad get the urn, but if the Super Squad gets the urn, they’ll be monster magnets again. Kaleb asks who he gets to fight. Sorry, buddy – you’re on compulsion duty. First, they need to get Triad to believe the Super Squad is on their side. Kaleb thinks his job is boring, but Alaric promises that if he can pull off what Alaric has in mind for him, things definitely won’t be boring.

Alaric and the girls head downtown to find the mummy, and also to keep fighting, because Lizzie refuses to let things go. She gives Hope one last chance to explain why she was so mean to Lizzie after the fire. She thinks it was because Hope felt guilty. Hope says Lizzie was mean to her, actually. Lizzie says it’s because Hope told people that she had an episode – her first – when the trip got canceled. According to her, Hope said she was “witch bipolar.”

Hope insists firmly that she would never do that. Josie tries to play peacemaker again but Lizzie ignores her and accuses Hope of using her mental health struggles against her. Hope says she didn’t even know what was going on with Lizzie and repeats that she would never gossip about her. Josie refocuses them with a title drop: “There’s a mummy on Main Street.”

Kaleb compels a townsperson to ask for a raise at work. And he’d better not let them stiff him on bonuses! P.S. There were no hornets. Kaleb compels a woman to believe the same thing, then tells her that her perfume isn’t covering up the smell of the cigarettes she’s been sneaking. She needs to quit smoking. He believes in her. Next Kaleb warns Alice that she’s going to be Triad’s scapegoat and starts to compel her to follow his instructions.

Alaric points a crossbow at the mummy as the girls wonder how to fight it. They tell Alaric to get behind them, since they’re the ones who can actually defeat the mummy. The mummy releases another swarm of hornets from its mouth, but the girls put up a barrier spell. Alaric applauds their teamwork. Lizzie wants to rush the mummy, but Hope has a plan and wants to wait. Before they can make a move, the mummy makes her cough up bugs. Josie conjures up a fireball and uses it to take out the mummy. The urn comes to a rest on a pile of mummy ashes. “Worst spring break ever,” Lizzie declares. Wait till she sees the next episode!

Triad clears the recovery tent and Clarke thanks Alaric for his help. He hopes they’ll never see each other again, and that he never gets assigned to look into the school. Alaric gives him a look that says, “If you do, we’ll be waiting with weapons and spells that conjure fireballs.” A Triad guy ends up with the urn, as well as a scarab from the mummy’s chest. Alaric thinks that that scarab is what keeps the mummy alive, so it won’t be completely dead until the twins siphon it. That means the Super Squad can’t leave yet.

Alaric opens the hood of the mini-van to make it look like they’re having car trouble. Lizzie’s annoyed to have to spend more time with Hope. In the recovery tent, the case the scarab was placed in starts to smoke, and a Triad guy realizes it’s eaten right through the case. While he’s distracted, Alice eyes the urn.

Josie asks if giving the urn to the mummy and opening the portal to Malivore would really be that bad. Josie, have you been paying attention? What part of “opening the portal will lead to the destruction of all supernatural beings” do you not understand? Hope notes that none of the creatures that have come back from Malivore have seemed “happy and balanced.” Lizzie sides with Josie, because of course. The scarab creates a mini-tornado and uses medical bandages to rebuild the mummy’s body. Alaric says that in a way, siphoning the scarab will be setting the mummy free from its prison.

People run out of the tent as the mummy finishes reviving. Alaric plays dumb with Clarke, pretending he doesn’t know why it’s still alive. Hope says it’s looking for the urn, and Alaric tells Clarke to give it to him. But the urn is gone, and no one at Triad knows what happened to it, since only their guys have been in the tent. Alaric signals Kaleb, who grabs the scarab from the mummy and tosses it to the twins. As they start to siphon it, Hope puts up a barrier to protect everyone from more bugs. The twins finish the job and kill the mummy for good. Alaric’s like, “Nice working with you, Clarke, and you’re welcome.”

The group meets up with Alice on a road and she gives them the urn. But before they can head back to Virginia, Clarke pulls up behind them. Triad has kidnapped Dorian and Emma, and it’s clear without anyone saying anything that they’ll only free them in exchange for the urn. So Alaric ends the day without the urn, and having to drive however many hours back home with Emma and Dorian cuddled up in the back of the van.

Hope tells Lizzie that if she really thought Hope said horrible things to her all those years ago, her hatred of Hope makes sense. But since her father and grandfather weren’t exactly models of mental health, she could easily be in Lizzie’s shoes, and she would never make fun of someone for it. Lizzie says she believes Hope. Hope asks where Lizzie heard the rumor from in the first place, and Lizzie looks at Josie. Josie gives a look that says she’s been busted.

Kaleb goes to the kitchen for a midnight snack – a school-approved, blood bag-provided midnight snack. Alaric finds him and thanks him for his help. He showed what he’s made of and had everyone’s backs. Kaleb tells him that the students need to have access to their full powers. All he did today was compel some people and it tapped his energy. He needs human blood and the witches need to learn offensive spells. He respects what Alaric’s doing at the school, but times have changed, so the rules need to change, too.

Hope and Lizzie confront Josie for driving a wedge between them. Josie confesses that not only did she lie, but she started the fire. Lizzie made a comment about Josie being obsessed with Hope, so Josie lied to distract Lizzie from realizing that Josie had a crush on Hope. She’d slipped a note into Hope’s room and was embarrassed but couldn’t get it back, so she started the fire, which got out of control. Lizzie asks why it would matter that she knew that Josie had feelings for Hope. Josie replies that every time she ever has a crush on someone, Lizzie goes after them, and she always wins. Hope is flattered that Josie had a crush on her. “Of course I did. Who wouldn’t?” Josie replies.

Emma tells Dorian that she wasn’t sure before how she felt about him, but spending all that time worrying about him today made her sure. She was confused because she kissed Alaric. Yeah, she had a slug in her, but she doesn’t think that’s an excuse. She swears that she doesn’t want to be with Alaric. Dorian asks if Alaric had a slug in him when they kissed. After hearing the answer, Dorian goes straight to Alaric, punches him, and announces that he quits.

Clarke takes the urn to Triad, where a security guard tells him to get moving – their boss, Mrs. G., wants it in the vault right away. Clarke shoots the guard, then takes the urn to the Malivore pit and tosses it in. That’s two locks released, and just one left…

Keep in mind: Clarke’s boss is a woman named Mrs. G.

Etc.: Marguerite MacIntyre (Liz) co-wrote this episode.

Kaleb is at peak Kaleb in this episode, and Chris Lee plays him perfectly.

No offense to Josie but if we were on a road trip and she pulled out a ukulele and sang something that included the lyrics “my heart wrote a little song for you,” I’d strand her at a rest stop.

I commend everyone on the trip for not telling Hope and Lizzie to shut up every ten seconds. I would not have the same self-control.

I guess Hope forgot that Mikael wasn’t her biological grandfather, so whatever was wrong with him (which was…a lot), she won’t inherit it.

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